Sunday, April 06, 2008

Moody and Gray

And cranky. Very cranky.
Which means that (a) I bailed on the Non-Bris Party and
(b) Y is a little peeved.

I did manage to get up to go with him to brunch with his friend visiting from NYC. We went to the Red Dog Cafe ... a place I doubt I'll visit again ... Not just because the service was bad (like, um, hello? coffee refill? asking how the food is or if we need anything? would that be possible? apparently not), but also because the food was, not bad, but bland. Flavorless. Dull. Uninteresting. Things I can make at home ... and make better.

Of course, b/c I was getting cranky at being ignored by the crap waitstaff, I was not as participatory in the conversation. Which caused Y to think that his friend will think that I don't like her (um ... whatever.).

She talked like a mile a minute, and it was difficult to get a word in when I did feel like I had something to add to the conversation, which wasn't often because the conversation revolved around the following topics (1) Israel, (2) Israeli movies, (3) Israeli music, (4) Hebrew language, (5) Jews in general, and (5) Y's problems with his grad program. Yep, not exactly my areas of expertise. At one point, Y, bless him, thought he would try to bring me into the conversation by mentioning that his friend knows of my former best friend. Mm. Hm. Yep. The best way to get me involved in a conversation is to bring up a topic I don't like to talk about because it still makes me sad.

So by the end of brunch, I didn't think I could deal with several more hours of people whose main points of conversation would be at least 4 of the 5 topics already mentioned ... especially since a good portion could be conducted in a language I don't understand.

Y brought me home and went to the party. I've been watching movies and knitting, but my mood is still total crap.

Sometimes I think people, and by people I mean Y, don't bother looking past my usually cheery exterior to see that -right now- I'm under a lot of stress. I'm waiting to hear about being asked back for a second interview for a job for which I think I am uniquely qualified and would love doing. However, you can never anticipate an organization's hiring decision. If I don't get that job, I face the very real, and very scary, chance of being unemployed in less than 3 months.

Maybe another job opportunity will present itself. But what if it doesn't?
Unemployment like totally sucks.
And being worried about that sort of thing sucks even more.

I won't even go into some of the darker thoughts which have flitted across my brain the past few days.

And, to top it all off, BOSSY has a new boyfriend. I've been replaced. So sad.

OK. Now, forget you ever read this post. VUBOQ will be back to his normal self tomorrow.



  1. Anonymous6:24 PM

    Philly slaps Vuboq in the back of the head and says "Snap out of it"

  2. oh Darlin!

    come to biddy's house. i'll make you cupcakes with coffee liquor filling and we'll watch chick flicks and bash men till we feel better.


  3. This is what a blog is for. You write a great blog, almost always funny and/or snarky with lots of great pictures of the interesting things that happen in your life. And you seem to be a generally cheerful fellow. But no one is cheerful all the time, particularly when under the stress you now carry. You have every right to be moody. Y is expecting too much if he thinks you should go to the party today. He's probably used to you being up for a party all the time and doesn't recognize your need for down time. Cut him some slack. He's clueless, but loveable.

    I hope you get that call for a second interview tomorrow. :)

  4. empathies and sympathies on the waiting bit. i have to wait until at least friday to find out if i got the job. i do so hope i do. i mean, they called me for an interview the day after i put in my resume. that's a good sign, isn't it?

    i've got my toes crossed for you in a big way.

  5. Try to remember my YogaToes! They must make you smile:-) At least a moment....They will call you tomorrow. They will.

    I am exhausted from having spent 6 hours at IKEA for my new co-workers shopping....gah.

  6. Yuck! What a crappy weekend. Knitting is definitly the solution.

    Ever consider just throwing a full-blown drama-infused crying jag -- just to get Y's attention? Not that the option is mature or anything, but it might get the message across. Or would that freak him out the door?