Saturday, July 20, 2013

Yesterday. Today. Tomorrow

Yesterday ...

I went to work.
I had happy hour with friends.
I drank too much (four tom collinses).
I may (or may not) have made out with a guy who I used to date, who (later that evening) may (or may not) have made out with another guy in our group who I thought was rillyrilly cute.
Except I left early.
Because I was a little drunk.
So, rillyrilly cute guy became Fair Game.
I started texting guys in my phone who I haven't texted in a longlong time.
Some of them texted back.
I watched "Despicable Me."
I went to bed.

Today ...

I woke up.
I managed to get out of bed.
I may (or may not) have been a little overhung.
I walked to the Whole Foods.
I baked cookies.
3 dozen peanut butter cookies.
Almost 5 dozen snickerdoodles.
I used my new kitchenaid standmixer.
It's red.
 My new shoes arrived.
They are also red.
One dozen of the snickerdoodles cooked for too long.
They are like brickerdoodles.
 I tried to take a nap.
I couldn't sleep.
I watched "Despicable Me" again.
I pickled carrots.
I thought about going out to eat.
But, I decided to make lemony green bean salad with feta.  And pasta with pesto.
And 1 martini.  Maybe 2.
I thought about this blog.  And what I'm going to do with it.
And I still don't know.
I have eaten A LOT of cookies.

Tomorrow ...

I will run 10 miles.
I will eat more cookies.
I will iron many shirts.
I will have dinner and cocktails with Tomokito.
I will prepare for work.
I will not be sad.
I will not be lonely.
I will not miss him more than I already do.
I will miss him less.
And less.
And less.
Until he doesn't exist.

And, the Day After Tomorrow ...

That's a rillyrilly bad movie.
But you should watch it.
Just for the scene where the HeroTeens outrun the cold.



Sunday, July 14, 2013

And, I'm Telling You ...

The moment my heart broke was when the bottle of sunscreen he threw in anger hit the wall above my head.

And, that was my weekend.


Monday, July 01, 2013

The Tale of the Platter of Trials and Tribulations

Good Evening, my kittens!

Much has happened since my last posting.  I received a visit from a Famous Blogger, Professor and Author.  I have done many loads of laundry.  I have ironed many shirts.  I have drank (drunken?) many, many martinis.  I have started a new pottery session at a new studio.  But, all of these are stories for another time.  For, now, I must tell you the sad, sad Tale of the Platter of Trials and Tribulations ...

Once upon a time, in a pottery studio far, far away, there was a pottery student who decided to make a fun platter.

As he was throwing the fun platter, the walls became to thin.  And one of the walls developed a crack.

His pottery teacher had a great idea.  By making diagonal cuts similar to the crack, he could create an interesting folded/braided edge to the platter.

However, as he was doing this, the crack became worse, so the pottery student had to cut a half circle in the wall of the platter.

He balanced that half circle by making another one on the other side of the platter.  He had an idea that fun handles might make that work.

After the platter was leather hard, the pottery student trimmed the bottom to make it nice and light.

Then, he added circular twisted handles where the two half circle cuts had been made and placed the platter on the shelf to be bisque fired.

He waited a long time for the platter to be bisque fired.  One Sunday, many weeks later, he and K-Factor were in the studio.  He noticed that a bisque fire had happened, but his platter was nowhere to be seen.  He thought maybe it was still in the kiln and went about his business.

Later, K-Factor said, "Hey.  Isn't this your platter in the garbage?"

Um. WHAT?!?!  Apparently, someone had broken off a piece of the platter and -rather than leaving it with a note like a Thoughtful Person would do- threw the platter -which they did not make- into the trash.

The pottery student was Very Angry.  And may (or may not) have left a (slightly) passive aggressive note.

The pottery student still wanted to glaze the Platter of Trials and Tribulations, but the best glaze (aka Lisa's Favorite Blue) was all gone.  So, he waited ... and waited ... and waited ... and waited for the Studio Manager to make some more (fucking) glaze.

She finally did.

And he glazed the Platter.  And, he may (or may not have) applied wax to the spot where the platter had been broken as a kind of F-U to the person who broke the platter and then threw it away.

And then he waited ... and waited .. and waited .. and waited for it to be fired.  And, the session ended.  And, the platter still hadn't been fired.

The pottery student returned to the studio a few days after the "Final Firing."  Can you guess what wasn't ready?

If you guessed, "the Platter of Trials and Tribulations" you would be correct.

A month (or more?) later, K-Factor went to the studio to look for her Casserole of Trials and Tribulations (which is her story to tell).  It was GONE!  But, the Platter of Trials and Tribulations was (finally) ready and she brought it home.


The pottery student is still trying to decide if he wants to keep it.  Or, maybe, somewhere ... out there ... there is a place for it.  Hmmmmm ...