To the woman in front of me in line at the Border's Coffee Shop:
Have you ever worried that you're high maintenance? Probably not, but you are. high. maintenance.
Low maintance people do not hold up a line of caffeine-craving coffee lovers with the following inane requests:
1. Can you put my rice crispy treat in a bag, not a box?
2. Is it soft or crunchy? [answer: crunchy]
3. Oh. Could you put it in the microwave for, like, 5 seconds?
4. Could you dump out some of this hot tea and put a little ice in it?
5. [After touching the cup], Hm. Could you put a little more ice in it?
Not that you will ever do anything about your high maintenanceness. I just thought you should know.
Meanwhile, here's a Public Service Announcement from the research team at Vuboq, Inc.:
If you type "okeydokey" with your fingers not on the home keys, it comes out "plrufplru."
That is all.