The Secret Life of Bears

As you may know, I have two very special bears living with me.


This is Buddy:

He was my brother's teddy bear.

This is Buzzy:

He is my teddy bear.

Buddy and Buzzy are good friends.

We've had them for as long as I can remember.

Unfortunately, my parents could not afford to keep two ravenous teddy bears, so they moved in with me a few years ago.

Buzzy is the studious one. He reads all the time.

I think Buzzy may need glasses.

Buddy is very neat. He is always cleaning the room.

Last weekend, I learned a shocking secret.

I was cleaning out my files and found their birth certificates.

"Buddy" and "Buzzy" are only nicknames!

Buzzy's real name is Jesus Christ, and Buddy?

His name is actually Muhammad.

I know! I hope the Sudanese government doesn't find out!

Because what I'm about to disclose next could really tick. them. off.

Muhammad? Jesus?

It's time to come out of the closet.

Yep.

Muhammad and Jesus are gay bears.

Gay bears with no shame, because the let me photograph some rather intimate moments.

Muhammad and Jesus are versatile! Who knew? Not me. That's for sure.

But, y'know, being a gay bear isn't just about teh hot, steamy, sweaty, hairy buttsecks.

It's also about the love.

And, I know that Muhammad and Jesus love each other very very much.