Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Rain and Blue Skies

I'm unmotivated.

I've had a fun idea that I'm thinking of pursuing and marketing (somehow, maybe). But, according to Y, who "has the experience of owning his own start-up," I would need to show more commitment and motivation than he's seen from me.

And if this conversation hadn't started at about 10:55, as I was heading to bed, I would have been able to flesh it out a little more. It irks me to no end that someone who has known me for less than a year acts like he knows everything about me.

It all circles back to the way people define their lives, I think. I don't define mine by my job, and, thus, I'm not hypermotivated at work. Yet, people who are career-oriented view others through that lens as well. Through those blinders, I do appear unmotivated.

In the time we've been together, I have:

-Completed 2 short stories
-Grown my own chili peppers from seed (not to mention the Parsley That Will Not Die)
-Made lots and lots of fun vodka infusions
-Created interesting meat-free recipes (which I really should write down at some point)
-Planned and hosted countless parties
-Learned how to throw pottery on the kickwheel
-Volunteered to serve on my co-op's board

Why doesn't he see that?

And now I'm off to see if Strosnider's has any seeds ...


  1. not knowing what the substance of the business idea is and fully agreeing with you on how people project their own self-understanding onto others, oddly i can also see what Y was getting to. if career/ work is not how you define yourself or is not your main motivation in life, building your own business might be frustrating because your work will have to be the center of your life for an unforeseeable future-- that is until it's established. so maybe he has a little point. but my guess is that there is no way of knowing until you start putting together a business plan and consult with few professionals, etc...

  2. yer cuzin11:35 AM

    Pay no attention to Y. I have never seen you fail at anything you wanted to do. I have known you for almost 36 years. And, just because you're not crazy for your job doesn't mean you're not good at it. Nor does it mean you don't work hard. Because we both know that you are, a) good at it, and b) hard-working. The job is not challenging and you don't love it. That's about the job, not about you. Your ability to make a good life for yourself wherever you are, and whatever you're doing workwise, is one of the things I've always admired most about you.

  3. Very shortly we shall meet. Tell me your idea then. I will give you an honest opinion. Then you'll know.

  4. Well, all right, so Y had the "experience of owning his own startup". And where did that get him? Is he fabulously rich off of it? Well then...

    Nine out of ten small entrepreneurial ventures will fail for some reason or another, and not necessarily because the person running it is 'unmotivated' or 'uncommitted'. In fact, usually not. Working hard is one piece of the puzzle; working *smart* is another, and then there's dumb luck.

    I don't know if you could do it or not. I wonder about it myself sometimes, because that is what I plan on doing eventually. It's in my blood, after all (skipped both my parents oddly). But, there's no way to know for sure until you're there. I never knew I was a strong person or had a stubborn will until I had to really, actually survive. You might be surprised at what you learn about yourself when you put yourself to the test.

    Just make sure you have a Plan B in place when you take the plunge...

  5. I know you could kick my butt up and down Commitment Street (in the fashionable Follow-through Neighborhood). I think if you're motivated, you can do it, and if your motivation changes, you can adapt and still make it a success. But then, I only know the teeniest bit of you, so who am I to say? ;>)

  6. Some people are just naturally inclined to be negative when presented with ideas. It's just how they're built. I think you can safely disregard Y's attitude and move along with whatever you put your mind to.

  7. Eh, I think you're fucking *brilliant* to hell with all the poo-pooishness.

    Has Y ever really seen you on fire?

    Besides, you have much more disciplne than I can muster, good Lord, you do laundry several nights a week!

  8. - Made the most kickass HP scarf ever (which is about to go on a walk with me)! I shall tell everyone who asks that it was handcrafted by the most motivated knitting fingers in North America.

    (I think that was a rather unkind thing for Y to say to you.)