Monday, July 01, 2013

The Tale of the Platter of Trials and Tribulations

Good Evening, my kittens!

Much has happened since my last posting.  I received a visit from a Famous Blogger, Professor and Author.  I have done many loads of laundry.  I have ironed many shirts.  I have drank (drunken?) many, many martinis.  I have started a new pottery session at a new studio.  But, all of these are stories for another time.  For, now, I must tell you the sad, sad Tale of the Platter of Trials and Tribulations ...

Once upon a time, in a pottery studio far, far away, there was a pottery student who decided to make a fun platter.

As he was throwing the fun platter, the walls became to thin.  And one of the walls developed a crack.

His pottery teacher had a great idea.  By making diagonal cuts similar to the crack, he could create an interesting folded/braided edge to the platter.

However, as he was doing this, the crack became worse, so the pottery student had to cut a half circle in the wall of the platter.

He balanced that half circle by making another one on the other side of the platter.  He had an idea that fun handles might make that work.

After the platter was leather hard, the pottery student trimmed the bottom to make it nice and light.

Then, he added circular twisted handles where the two half circle cuts had been made and placed the platter on the shelf to be bisque fired.

He waited a long time for the platter to be bisque fired.  One Sunday, many weeks later, he and K-Factor were in the studio.  He noticed that a bisque fire had happened, but his platter was nowhere to be seen.  He thought maybe it was still in the kiln and went about his business.

Later, K-Factor said, "Hey.  Isn't this your platter in the garbage?"

Um. WHAT?!?!  Apparently, someone had broken off a piece of the platter and -rather than leaving it with a note like a Thoughtful Person would do- threw the platter -which they did not make- into the trash.

The pottery student was Very Angry.  And may (or may not) have left a (slightly) passive aggressive note.

The pottery student still wanted to glaze the Platter of Trials and Tribulations, but the best glaze (aka Lisa's Favorite Blue) was all gone.  So, he waited ... and waited ... and waited ... and waited for the Studio Manager to make some more (fucking) glaze.

She finally did.

And he glazed the Platter.  And, he may (or may not have) applied wax to the spot where the platter had been broken as a kind of F-U to the person who broke the platter and then threw it away.

And then he waited ... and waited .. and waited .. and waited for it to be fired.  And, the session ended.  And, the platter still hadn't been fired.

The pottery student returned to the studio a few days after the "Final Firing."  Can you guess what wasn't ready?

If you guessed, "the Platter of Trials and Tribulations" you would be correct.

A month (or more?) later, K-Factor went to the studio to look for her Casserole of Trials and Tribulations (which is her story to tell).  It was GONE!  But, the Platter of Trials and Tribulations was (finally) ready and she brought it home.


The pottery student is still trying to decide if he wants to keep it.  Or, maybe, somewhere ... out there ... there is a place for it.  Hmmmmm ...


1 comment:

  1. An epic tale: a dashing hero, a dastardly villian, trials and tribulations, a makeover, passive aggression, love lost and then found... it has it all. And a happy ending, too : ).