Vibrant.(Still) Unrepentant. Badass. Old. Queer

VUBOQ is supposed to get a call about The Job either today or Monday. Well, there are 33 minutes left in "today" and there has been no Call. Which means that, even though VUBOQ realizes that He could get a call on Monday, VUBOQ is totally panicking and knowing that they don't want to hire Him. Because, really, if they had totally loved VUBOQ wouldn't they be calling as soon as possible? [And, why does it smell like rotten eggs all of a sudden?] A weekend of being depressed and thinking the worst, when VUBOQ would have much rather spent shopping for a cute new shirt and tie to wear with his suit. What fun. *sigh*

Major disappointment . Y told me last night that the party on Sunday is not a bris. Boo. Hiss. I was so looking forward to that. I had even come up with the Perfect Bris Gift. Here is a rather imperfect rendition of my idea (to be printed on a baby t-shirt): Get it? The rest of my weekend plans are ... Tonight, Y and I are going on a date. He's taking me to Udupi Palace, which is a vegetarian Indian place in Langley Park. YUM. This is part of my birthday gift, btw. Then, we are coming back to my place to watch Sweeney Todd (finally). Tomorrow, I was planning to do some yard work: cleaning up the garden plot, weeding, spreading some compost, scattering wildflower seeds, etc. etc. etc. However, the weather is not looking like it wants to cooperate (rain! blah!). If it rains, I may spend the day on the sofa knitting and watching movies. Not that that's a bad thing ... Sunday, Y and I are having brunch with one of his friends from NYC. Then, we're going to the Not-Bris Party. ...

An anonymous commenter asked: What does 1st cousin once removed mean anyways??!! Luckily for all of you, I used to have to explain this sort of thing when I was teaching genetics to my biology students (many, many moons ago). So, using the StickSteven Family Tree , let's learn about cuzins! *w00t* This is my family tree: (dashed lines mean future/imaginary relationships) (you may need to click to embiggen) As you can see, StickSteven has StickGrandparents , StickParents , and a StickUncle and StickAunt . The children of StickSteven's StickUncle and StickAunt are StickSteven's StickCuzins ( StickFirstCuzins , if you will). The children of StickSteven's StickFirstCuzins are his StickFirstCuzinsOnceRemoved . The children of StickSteven's StickFirstCuzinsOnceRemoved are his StickFirstCuzinsTwiceRemoved . Do you see how that works? Now, it gets fun. Since StickSteven is a genetic deadend . Let's pretend that his StickBrother gets bizzay with his StickGirlfrie...

Dear Gabillion People Clicking Over from BOSSY : Here are all my BOSSY-related posts (including her Excellent Road Trip ). Here is my BOSSY's Visit Flickr Set . And, here is a big hug for all the gabillion hits: *HUG* Of course, you are more than welcome to read about my boring life. All that is below ... *smooches* --VUBOQ PS. And, this is the BOSSY's Excellent Road Trip Flickr group I started but am not very successfully recruiting any new members/photos.

On Sunday, I will be attending a bris . Oh, the advantages of having a Jewish boyfriend ... twice the holidays plus circumcision ceremonies! Never having attended a bris before, I've been having fun imagining things I would *love* to hear people say ... like ... from the Rabbi: "My hands usually stop shaking once the ceremony starts" or "I think I'm sober enough." or "Oops." Guests to the proud parents: "He probably won't despise you because you've ruined his sex life forever. He'll despise you for other reasons." or "Circumcision made me gay ... Not that there's anything wrong with that." or "Oops." On a more serious note, does one take a bris gift? Y is good friends with the couple and has already given them a baby gift. I have met them two or three times at various social functions ... if that matters. Maybe a baby t-shirt that reads CUT ? Or, my all-time favorite Cuter than Baby Jesus t-shirt: [...

I am back from my shopping excursion. I have purchased Sweeney Todd (2-disc Collector's Edition) for the grand total of ... wait for it ... $1.49. *w00t* I've said this before, and I'll say it again, I *heart* my Borders VISA. And, srsly, if you have a credit card and aren't getting anything (miles, points, whatevers), WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU THINKING?!?!?!? Companies should be paying you to use their card. It's the Red White and Blue American Forking Way! For every $500 I charge, I get a $5 gift certificate to Borders. Lousy rebate percentage (1%), but still ... I'm charging things anyway. I might as well get stuff for it. Like Sweeney Todd for $1.49. [or, um, $2501.49, depending on your perspective] I also went to Whole Foods where I bought a bag of oranges, frozen okra and corn, a red onion, and another plant for the garden, chocolate mint . Wonder what that will be like?

Last night, I found myself in front of my refrigerator vermouth in one hand, chilled martini glass in the other, when I remembered, "Alcohol-Free April." D-man. It's going to be a long, long month. How did everyone else do ? Last night for dinner, I made a really weird salad, involving mushroom , onions , and chili peppers sauteed in raspberry vinagrette and then served over mixed greens with warm pita. It wasn't bad , but I won't be making it again. Then, DUN, DUN's bf, and SCGB came down for chocolate tofu pie . It tasted a lot better than it did at Y's party. I don't know exactly why. Perhaps because (1) I knew it wasn't going to be sweet and (b) I wasn't distracted by 60 gabillion other choco-choices. Delicious. My plans for today, beside suffering through work, include buying Sweeney Todd on DVD and attacking Mount Laundry. Srsly. Dirty laundry is overtaking my bedroom. Blame it on weeks of houseguests and only one working w...

I was drinking expensive vodka up until the very last minute last night. And, now, no more booze until May. Thanks to all of you who have agreed to be Alcohol-free in April with me. We can do it ! Also, don't forget you only have two more weeks to sign up for the 10% Refund Challenge or the Poor Bastages Who Owe the Taxman Pity Party ! Enter now for the chance to win fabulous (TBD) prizes! Drawings to be held on April 15th. Finally, on a sadder note, after much thought and serious contemplation, I have decided I will be giving up blogging after the 10% Refund Challenge is over. I have enjoyed getting to know all of you, but the mental toll this daily exercise takes is just too much. "I want to see mountains again, mountains Gandalf! And then find somewhere quiet where I can finish my book."

This is what happens when you open your home to wandering bloggers: You start to get tagged for memes ... and then FIVE DAYS LATER realize that you've been tagged. So, Confessions of a Marathon Mom did taggeth me for the 6 Words Memoir Meme ( See ?). The rules are: Sum up my life in six words. No more, no less. The loophole is you can write as many of these six word sentences as you want. Oooh. Fun. No? Thank gawd I don't have to tag 6 people or say my 6 favorite types of cheese or how I'm 6 degrees of separation from Peter Cetera (actually, I'm only 3, which puts me 4 away from, OM-forking-G, CHER!!!!). I seem to be rambling ... so here's (a part of my) life in Six Word Sentences : I, Vicious Unrepentant Bitter Old Queen. Am *way* cooler than I, Claudius . I don't know what that means. Having never actually watched I, Claudius . Someone said it was good though. Someone said I was good too. Of course, then he slept with a long-haired skinny twenty-someth...

And I will be pulling handles and trimming in pottery class tonight. I enjoy trimming. But it seems like a waste of time to do it when I could be receiving instruction. I prefer to trim and pull handles in open studio. But one of us was too overhung to go to open studio on Sunday. So, today, I'll be trimming. And pulling handles. Maybe I'll have some glazing to do or maybe I'll stay late and make a pot or two. And, maybe, the sun will come out. Why isn't it Go Home Time, yet?

My boss treated us to Chinese takeout for lunch today. I had the Szechuan Homestyle Tofu. YUM! This was my fortune: You like participating in competitive sports. A-hahahahaha. *deep breath* a-HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *ahem* No. I ate another fortune cookie: From now on your kindness will lead you to success. Much better ... but I guess that means I should stop sending " I hope you SCREW UP ROYALLY " vibes to the person who is interviewing for *my* job on Thursday.

Tonight will be my last opportunity to partake of the fabulous fermented beverages I do so love for an entire month . March was an exercise in Bacchanalian frivolity, and my liver could use the break. Some of you may doubt my resolve, but let me remind you of International Liver Resting Week 2007 , in which VUBOQ did not drink for an entire week ! Not convinced? Although I can not provide a link as this happened during my Diary-X days, after my 35th Birthday Party and resulting 2-day hangover and mysterious gaping wound between my eyebrows, VUBOQ gave up the booze for six months. SIX MONTHS! DURING PRIME AFTERNOON MARGARITA SEASON ! Is that not the epitome of resolve and determination? [And if you doubt the veracity of the above, please contact Tomokito . She witnessed the whole sordid affair.] One month should be a piece of cake. I, of course, am willing to accept Alcohol-Free April Partners , if anyone should so desire to join me in the detoxification process. I (We?) will be eating...

ack. The recruiter emailed that she has found another candidate for the organization to interview. This is good in that the process can move along quickly. This is bad in that it has raised all sorts of self-doubt. Like, what if they like that person better? What if that person is more qualified? Or gives better interview? I know ... It's hard to imagine, but it could happen. I should find out Friday (or next Monday) what will happen next. stressful. Not much else going on. Pottery class tonight. Alcohol-free April starts tomorrow. *w00t* More later. *smooches*

For Y's 40th Birthday Party, in addition to all the food we purchased, I decided a few homemade goodies would help to make it extra-special. First, I made Mel's delicious Chocolate Tofu Pie. Here it is in the blender: And, then, poured into two crusts (chocolate and graham, both purchased at Whole Foods): Easy peasy to make. And yummy (but not quite as sweet as I thought it would be. I might put in more maple syrup if I make them again). Next, I melted half a bag of semisweet chocolate chips and dipped strawberries in it: Warning: Do not let your children lick the bowl or they may end up looking like this: Next, I made chocolate chip cookies. I experimented by putting some Peanut Butter M&Ms in a few: This is the second batch (with no M&Ms): This is the third, and final, batch (with M&Ms): Colorful! Peanut butter-y! Finally, I used the last of the semisweet chocolate chips to make chocolate-covered pretzels: After all that, I was EXHAUSTED, but there was still ...

Y's 40th Birthday Party is tonight. I have been super busy food prep bunny today. Lots of fun photos to come (hopefully) tomorrow. Until then, here's a teaser: I made those. Yes, I did. Am I not the most cleverest everest? Stay tuned, kittens. *smooches*

Here's a link to the Dead at 40 Crossword Puzzle I made. [and, yes, I realize that some of these people died at 39 ... but, whatever, close enough.] Have fun! Let me know what you think :-) *smooches*

And, lo, there came from on high a call, which pierced the air with it's high-pitched screech. Yeah. That was me. After a very frustrating call with Y. GAH! This is a reconstruction of the conversation: V: So what kind of food do you want for your party on Saturday? Y: I don't care. V: Maybe a little hint? Y: I have eggrolls in the freezer. They have chicken in them. V: Um. OK. Anything else? Y: I just want people to be happy. V: Do you think they will be happy with only frozen chicken eggrolls? Y: I don't know. V: Do you want the food to focus around a specific theme? Like middle eastern or asian? We can get hummus and babaganouj and pita and, maybe, some spanakopita. Y: I guess we could. I don't know. Seems like I always have those things at parties. V: OK. You want something different. What? Y: I don't care if it has a theme. My only thing is that the guests are happy. V: The guests won't be happy if you don't decide on what food you want. ...

The recruiter called. They LOVED me. I'm a perfect fit. Not only because of my knowledge and skills, but also my winning personality. HURRAY! BUT ... before we break out the champagne ... I'm the first only candidate they've interviewed, so, in order to give due diligence to the process, they want to wait a few weeks to see if anyone else qualified will apply. My second interview will not be for another 2-3 weeks. GAH! The recruiter, of course, was all let me know if there are any changes in your circumstances during that time. I am assuming she means if I get any other job offers. We shall see ... My dear kittens, I hope your fingers don't cramp up from keeping them crossed all this time.

Good morning, Kittens! Yeah yeah yeah I know I know I know. I was supposed to blog all about BOSSY's Stopover in Vutopia last night ... but I was tired and opted for a martini and bed (not at the same time). You know how it is. Anyway, ShallowGal [She's a Hot Tranny Mess !] did a much better (and funnier) post about the gathering than I ever could. Go there. Read it, now . WAIT! Finish reading my post first, please. So, after leaving the bar, I forced BOSSY to ride the Metro (the horror!). Srsly, I love the Metro. I could ride it every day (and I might, if this job-thing happens). We had to change trains . So exciting this Big City Life. Then, we had to jog for the bus ! Exercise. It is good for us. Luckily, the bus stops directly in front of my building. We chatted. We had lots of water. Hydration, kittens. It is important. Y came over. I gave him his birthday present. We chatted. We went to bed. Well, BOSSY went to bed. I went to bed. Y stayed up until about 3AM grading pape...

The interview went very well. I'm sure they loved me (How could they not?). I am tired. And doing laundry. And eating pretzels. And soon to be drinking a martini. Interview details to come tomorrow. Many thanks for all the good vibes sent my way. *smooches*