Splitting Hairs

Since no one seems to read blogs on Friday anyway, here is a brief photo essay of my Hair Adventure:

This is Leah the Colornatrix working her styling magic (this trip we cut before we colored).


The Colornatrix and I post cut. Don't we look cute? Isn't she fabulous?


This is the part where I suffer for beauty. Srsly. The chemicals burn my eyes and I cry.


After the salon, I met Mike for dinner at 4912 (Yummy Thai Food).
[I'm the one on your right].

And, there you have it.
Seems like Straight Guys get their hair cut, too.

I'm off work at 12:30 today and heading to New York City soon thereafter! Will post all about my exciting Big Apple Adventure [and stalking of Puntabulous] on Monday!

*smooches*

At Last. I Have Found It.

For lunch today, I decided to buy a bag of chips from Whole Foods. I eventually settled on Kettle brand Krinkle Cut Chips Buffalo Bleu flavor: "BRAZEN spice mellowed by bleu cheese."

Hm. I like bleu cheese. I like BRAZEN spice [I also wonder why BRAZEN has to be in all caps, but I didn't make the Kettle brand Krinkle Cut Chips Packaging Rules].

So, here I am contemplating the all natural, transfatless potato chip:

Look at those flavor-filled nooks and crannies! Is your mouth watering?

Then, the taste:

*crunch* *chew* *crunch* *chew*

According to the bag, "the tangy chili spice hits you right up front with this bold chip. The hint of bleu cheese takes time to arrive, but when it does you'll know."

Oh, yes. I knew:

The worst tasting potato chip since VUBOQ ate Kettle brand Cheddar and Beer flavor [which should be marketed with the slogan "It tastes like sweaty feet! YUM"].

But, I can't stop eating them.

Someone, send help.

As Gawd As Mah Witness

I will nevah go this long without a haircut again.

*bites carrot*

*crumples to ground*

If you don't feel good about your hair, it's likely you don't feel good about other things too. Right now, I am not feeling good about the hair - it's too long; it's too rooty; and something *must* be done.

Srsly, kittens, VUBOQ is a firm believer in Truvy's mantra, "There is no such thing as natural beauty." Normally, I get my haircut about every 5-6 weeks, with color done every other visit. I can't even remember the last time I had a haircut. I wonder if Leah the Colornatrix* will even remember me. After all, I've only been going to her for about 6 years.

My appointment today is at 5, but I'm leaving work at 2:30. I think I'll camp out at a coffee shop near the salon for awhile and work on some job applications. I may be meeting Mike afterwards for dinner, but that is yet to be determined.

Then, I will need to rush home to pack for New York City! YAYZ!

But, more about that tomorrow (or this afternoon, depending on how bored I get).

*smooches*

*Unfortunately, Mel, the -Natrix is not after the water snake, but, rather, because during one visit, she looked at me, and Dominatrix-like said, "You WILL be blond." And, thus, I became a blond.

Why I Am So Glad I'm Getting a Hair Cut Tomorrow

A Photo Montage

And, now, I must find my battery charger so I can take the "During" and "After" Pix.

*smooches*

Guilty Pleasures

Biddy tagged me for this Guilty Pleasures Meme.

One of the many great things about being a VUBOQ is that the unrepentant part allows for a fairly guilt-free life ... so here are some of my simple pleasures:


1. dirty martinis (with expensive gin)
2. ice cream
3. good cheese from Whole Foods
4. a visit to Leah, the Colornatrix.
5. laying in the grass looking at the sky
6. pottery
7. really nice chocolate
8. splurging on cute clothes I don't need
9. blobbing on the sofa
10. host spur-of-the-moment social gatherings

It would seem that the Straight Guy decided to do this one as well. What up with that? I thought Straight Guys didn't dig memes.

Keeping Up With the Memeses

Marathon Mom tagged me for her new Three Words Meme, which is sweeping teh intartubez!

I'm not quite sure if I'm doing this correctly, but here are her instructions:

Pick three things about the evening that made it fun (so hard). Then I will think of other things that can be described by [at least one of?] those same three things that are not related but completely random.

So here we go ...

My Three Words: Party. Booze. Neighbors.

friends
surprise
gay
straight
Japanese
American
male
female
black
white
gin & tonic
limes
vodka
pink champagne
cheese
dip
birthday
kiss
photographs
gossip
beer

I'm not going to tag anyone for this particular meme, because I've heard a rumor that a certain Straight Guy has also done this meme. And he's tagged three lucky ladies hot chicks.

I still have one more meme to do, so tune in later today for that.
Also, it's Tomokito's birthday! Happy Birthday to the best Upstairs Neighbor EVAR!!!

More later. *smooches*

Meat-Free Tuesday: Stinky Pee Edition

And, yay, Isabella has just given forth the Vomit of Joy. Huzzah.

I don't think it has anything to do with my dinner ...

Which is: Asparagus and Tomato Pasta with Goat Cheese.

Basically, I stir-fried some asparagus with garlic, oregano and basil. Added some goat cheese and a diced roma tomato and a little cream. Then I tossed it all with pasta.

It's not half bad.

It's also not something I will make again in the near future (mainly because I rarely buy asparagus). And goat cheese is expensive.

Guess that's it.

I'm working on a couple of memes and will try to post those tomorrow.

I've heard a rumor that a certain Straight Guy is also working on the same memes. We'll see how that comes out. We all know how bad straight guys are at finishing what they started...

'Til tomorrow. *smooches*

Alas, Poor Leopold's.

I knew it well, Blog Readers. A gin of excellent taste.

On the plus side, Leopold's is moving to Colorado and (eventually) will be distributed in North Carolina. On the minus side, I have one less reason to visit my SuperFantastic Cuzin in the Frozen Tundra. On the plus side, I will have (a) another reason to visit my brother and other SuperFantastic Cuzin and (b) one more coping mechanism when I'm at the ol' homestead.

I bought the bottle pictured a few years ago for my birthday. It is stored comfortably in my freezer and still has a few ounces left, maybe enough for 2 martinis. I've been saving the last remnants for either the start of my unemployment or the start of a new, exciting job opportunity (whichever comes first). However, I am wondering if I should drink it tonight ...

Oh, the quandry, the conundrum, the diabolical twists of fate.

Perhaps I will wait. *smooches*

Weekend Update: Memorial Day Weekend Edition

Good morning, kittens.

What a weekend! I'm exhausted (from doing abso-forkin'-lutely nothing).

Friday, I stayed home and chilled. I knitted. I watched DVDs. I goofed around online playing Scramble.

Saturday morning, I did some cleaning and gardening. Then, at 4:30, I went upstairs to Tomokito's Pre-Birthday Bash (her birthday, and Mike's, is on the 28th). It was a total blast-o-rama. You can see all the fun pix here. I left the party around 1AM. I was slightly intoxicated.

But, not hungover on Sunday morning (woo hoo!). Y and I got up, had a nice breakfast, and, then, we headed over to his place. A couple of his friends came over for a late lunch and hanging out in the park near his building. It was nice. They left around 4, I think.

I headed back home around 7. Normally, I would have stayed, but I was cat-sitting for DUN. Tomokito came down around 9:30, and we watched Enchanted. OMG. What a totes fun movie! Loved it. Of course, I've luved Amy Adams since Junebug, so I'm not surprised I luved her in this movie as well.

Monday, I did lots of blobbing around. Some time after noon, I called to see what Tomokito was doing. We decided to have a mini-picnic in the front yard. I created a cocktail just for the event.

Whenever I make coffee, I make a lot of coffee. Instead of pouring the leftover coffee down the drain, I freeze it into cubes. So in my freezer, I have a bag FULL of coffee ice cubes. For the new cocktail, I filled a glass with coffee ice cubes. Then, I poured 1 oz of creme de cacao and 3 oz of vodka over it. I suspect I could have added some cream as well (if I had had cream). It was quite a refreshing concoction. Try it at home sometime.

Around 8, I met Y at El Golfo for dinner. We came home. I made him watch Enchanted. Then, I went to bed.

It was hot. I didn't sleep well, a rather unpleasant ending to an otherwise fantastic weekend. Lots of booze. Lots of buttsecks (actually, possibly too much buttsecks). Lots of good times with good friends. I don't think it could get any better (unless, maybe, my apartment magically cleaned itself).

How was your Memorial Day Weekend? Memorable?

More later. *smooches*

PS. Straight Guys dig politics!

Happy Memorial Day

Good morning, kittens.
Just a quick note to say "hi."
We'll be reporting on the weekend tomorrow. I hope you will be able to survive until then without me.

To help tide you over, the Straight Guy has made a Very Special Memorial Day post. Enjoy.

*smooches*

Saturday in the Park with Syphillis

The Continuing Saga of ...

The Birth of VUBOQ as Re-Enacted by Gay Bears (and a Virus or Two)

It's been awhile so to refresh your memories, here are links to the two previous installments:

The Cast of Characters

Part II: Syphillis in the Parsley

And, now, for

Part III: Saturday in the Park with Syphillis

The weather was gorgeous, and VUBOQ sat in the sun, doing what VUBOQs do when they are in a park on a beautiful day, surrounded by gorgeous shirtless men.

He knitted.

And, Syphillis, being Syphillis, did what Syphilli do when they are in a park on a beautiful day, surrounded by gorgeous shirtless men.

He searched for someone he could hook up with later to share a little STD-luvin'.

After hours of knitting (and cruising), Syphillis told VUBOQ that he was going to meet a friend for dinner. "You are welcome to join us," Syphillis said.

So, VUBOQ packed up his knitting bag and walked with Syphillis to Sette, a yummy pizza place just north of Dupont Circle.

There, VUBOQ was introduced, over pizza* and, perhaps, too much wine, to Syphillis' friend, Mono.

As the evening progressed, and the wine bottle emptied, the conversation turned, as most conversations between a Gay Bear and Two Nasty Viruses do, to gossip.

To be continued ...

*The pizza at Sette was not over-cooked like the pizza in the photo. VUBOQ got a little too excited about the Gay Bear Photography session and forgot it was in the toaster oven re-heating. Oops.

Life Stages

Apparently, this whole gay thing is just a stage I'm going through:

[If you can't read it, it says "You and your wife willbe happy in your life together."]



Last night, I headed over to Y's. We ate Chinese take-out. Then, watched Layer Cake. If you haven't seen that movie, you should. Not only does it have the Super Hot Daniel Craig in it, but it also is a fun, complicated, convoluted film. PLUS, it's fun to spot the "Harry Potter" character actors (I saw two. There could've been more).

This morning, we had a nice long lie-in. Then, I got ready and metro'ed to work. I bought a Greek Salad at Panera on the walk to the office. Mmm. Greek Salad.

This weekend, I'll be attending Tomokito's pre-Birthday Party on Saturday. On Sunday, I am hoping to get tickets to the free production of Hamlet at the Carter-Barron Amphitheater. No plans for tonight other than knitting and watching DVDs.

I do have several job applications I need to complete as well.

I don't know what I'm going to do on Monday. If it's nice, maybe I'll go for a bike ride or something. Or just chill out in the Circle. I'm sure I'll think of something fun and appropriate for the holiday.

BTW, the Straight Guy has posted a little essay about Women.

I Can Haz Hair Appt. [Now with Pix!]

I had a lovely dinner with SuperHotBloggerChick. You can read all the gory details here.

[Recently added info:] And since I'm most definitely not a straight guy (srsly), I can use this forum (HUZZAH) to completely queen out and be all, "OMG! We totally ordered the exact. same. thing." It *must* be Blogger Luv (Bluv?). I have a picture to prove it (but I think I'm going to post it over there just to make you go read my other blog).

[VUBOQ is such a meany!]

As soon as I got back from lunch (and blogged about it. Priorities, people!), I called the salon to make an appointment with Leah, the Colornatrix (love her!).

Thursday, 5/29, 5PM. Suh-WEET! I will be looking SuperFine for my Excellent Weekend in NYC. Yayz.

Then, I scrolled through my bloglines to catch up on all the wonderful bloggers who had posted during my lunch break (not enough of you! C'mon people! I need to be entertained!).

And, ACK!, BOSSY has linked to my other blog! I just blogged about touching a breast! In public!!! GAH! PANIC!

And, I haven't even installed a counter on that blog yet so I won't know how many lives I've ruined.

I'm so sorry.
But you can blame BOSSY.

*smooches*

I Can Haz Martini?

Good morning, kittens. It's a beautiful, if slightly cold day here in Vutopia ... at least the weekend will be fan-forkin'-tastic! HUZZAH!

I left work yesterday at 2:30. Because I could. It was nice. I didn't do much of anything other than blob on the 'netz. Scott-o-rama got me all into these new ... um ... Twitter-like thingies, Jaiku and Pownce. And, then, he showed me ping.fm ... which let's you update all those bitches (+ facebook) at the same time! Isn't technology an amazing thing? Yet, I'm not quite sure of the purpose of all these thingies. I'm sure it will come to me eventually.

In the meantime, I guess I am a pinging powncing twittering jaikuing fool. Yippee.

Anyway, back to my evening, I did laundry. I ate leftovers. I had french vanilla ice cream with chocolate sauce. Then, I had another drink. I really wanted bourbon. But, OH MY GOD CRISIS OF EPIC PROPORTIONS!!!! I was out of bourbon. Cognac is not a good substitute.

I also spoke to one of my best friends from college. She asked a question, "If you looked at Y's cell phone and saw a lot of text messages and calls from the same person at all hours of the day and one of those text messages read, 'I am so horny,' what would you do?"

VUBOQ's answer: Freak the fuck out. What would you do?

She, apparently, would do the same thing.
Send her some good thoughts, wouldja?

Today, I am meeting a SuperHot Blogger for lunch at Adega. HUZZAH!

Who thinks this could become potential fodder for a totally Str8Guy Post? Stay tuned, kittens. Of course, my boss has also decided to buy us all lunch today to celebrate co-worker's birthday. Hopefully, it will be something I can take home for dinner tonight.

I guess that's it for now. More later. *smooches*

My, What Big Teeth You Have

This is a picture from the cocktail graduation party on Sunday. Don't we look cute in our cocktail attire.

Things you should note:

(1) VUBOQ has the cheesiest grin EVER, esp. when he is slightly intoximacated. Can one be hungover and intoximacated at the same time? Because VUBOQ was.
(2) VUBOQ needs to decide if he should get a haircut or continue the 70s shaggy look. He is leaning towards getting a haircut (and color!).
(3) VUBOQ picked Y's outfit. Y questioned the choice of tie. One should not doubt VUBOQ.

Did I Mention?

I am a WINNAR!!!
[on Project Rungay?]
[and I'll be getting a super-cool Prize Package?]
[in the mail?]
[soon?]

Please be jealous of me.
Thank you.

Meanwhile, not much happened yesterday.
I blobbed.
I found an interesting job to apply for.
I need to work on that today ... I guess.
Y came over for dinner - leftovers from last night.
He stayed over. Which was nice, b/c the apartment was V. COLD.
I like having a CuddleBunny.
SCGB left this morning for, like, 7 weeks in Europe. I am trying not to hate him too much.
I get to leave work today at 2:30. Huzzah.
Tonight is Laundry Night. I need to remember to get quarters.

More later. *smooches*

PS. The Straight Guy offers up some television commentary.

A Brief Update

That annoying Straight Guy has finally put up his first ever Meat-Filled Monday post.
Check it out: Meat-Filled Monday: Start at the Very Beginning.

[I hear he loves comments, so leave him a note. Especially if you're a Hot Chick!]

Meat-Free Monday: Toss My Salad Edition

Well, hello, Cook's Little Helper [and, hello, 5 GABILLION people clicking over from Project Rungay, here's a *smooch* just for you] ...

And Orzo Salad.

BOSSY comes to your house [months ago!], stays one night and then you are constantly overcome with the desire to eat entire bags of lettuce at one sitting.

The salad is:
Olives, feta, tomato, orzo and pine nuts.

The dressing:
Lemon juice, olive oil, parsley and oregano (from my herb garden!)

The martiniCook's Little Helper:
Delicious.


Then, we moved on to the dessert course [Great guess, btw, Java!]:
Whole Foods 365 French Vanilla Ice Cream with chocolate ganache. So easy to make! So delicious! YAYZ!

That breeder straight guy will be updating this afternoon. He has some work to do this morning. Bleah.

Play a Guessing Game with VUBOQ

I hath returned from my foraging trip to Whole Foods.

Here's my shopping list:

3 roma tomatoes
1 can sliced black olives
feta
pine nuts
1 pint heavy cream
Ghiradelli Dark Chocolate Chips

Can you guess what the Meat-Free Monday meal will be?

P.S. At 4 PM, head over to If I Were a Straight Guy for an exciting announcement!

Weekend Update: I Could Use a Nap Edition

Good Monday Morning, Kittens.

What a weekend. I am totally worn out. After a completely lazy Friday afternoon/evening/night, Saturday and Sunday were a whirlwind of activity.

Saturday morning, I was up early to clean the house. I swept and vacuumed and scrubbed and wiped and washed and dried and all sorts of stuff. I finished before lunch (yay!), ran to the store, and, then, had time for a quick power nap. Around 6:30ish, Ray, Joey, Tomokito, Eric from Baltimore, and SCGB came down for pre-going out cocktails.

I made a variation on the cocktail I invented for a contest (which I didn't win):

Muddle 10-15 blueberries into 2 oz of vodka.
Strain into shaker.
Add 1 oz blueberry juice.
Shake with ice.
Strain into chilled cocktail glass.
Top with Whole Foods 365 Natural Lemon Italian Soda.
Garnish with lime slice.

Delicious.
[The cocktail I submitted for the contest used gin instead of vodka and was served in a tall glass over ice.]

Around 8PM, we went to downtown Silver Spring for dinner at Austin Grill (margaritas!). Then, we headed to the new(ish) club, Town. It was fun. I drank a bit*. And we danced a lot. Y joined us at some point (maybe around 1?). I think we left about 2:30 or so. Home at 3:30. In bed by 4.

Sunday morning. V. Hungover. And tired. Like super-tired. Like, really, I'm too old to be living this crazy life. A lot of water, a lot of sleep, and some super-hot buttsecks, and I was good to go ... by 2PM.

Because we had to be in Baltimore at 4 for Y's friend's graduation cocktail party. Fortunately, the attire was not funky casual or anything. Y called his friend and she said "basic cocktail attire." Hoo-ray. VUBOQ can rock the jacket and tie look. Y looked nice too.

The party was held at the American Visionary Arts Museum near the Inner Harbor. At some point we should all discuss "untrained" contemporary folk artists' tendency to use religious themes and iconography. We toured the museum for about an hour. Then, went to the party in a separate building. The party was nice. Good food and wine. Pleasant company.

We left the party around 6:30 to meet Eric from Baltimore for dinner at a sushi restaurant, XS. It was quite good. We left around 8.

Y had to be home by 9 to watch the exciting season finale of Desperate Housewives (aka. Refugees from 90s TV). I won't give away any spoilers for those of you that haven't seen it, but wasn't that Brian from Queer as Folk in the last scene? Or was I hallucinating?

Went to bed soon after the show ended. Got up this morning. Came to work. Am thinking about what I want to make for Meat-Free Monday tonight... possibly nothing. I'm tired and may go the processed food route. I know. I'm lame.

So, that's it. Stay tuned for an If I Were a Straight Guy Weekend Update later today (possibly this afternoon).

12:30 PM Update: IIWASG's Weekend Update is up! Huzzah!

More later. *smooches*

*and by "a bit" I mean "a lot."

Update

Good Saturday Morning, Kittens.

The Straight Guy has posted about his date last night.

Check it out.

He has all the fun. I'm cleaning the cat box.

*smooches*

VUBOQ Has Had YET ANOTHER Brilliant Idea

Check it out!
Here.

Now, you may worship me on TWO blogs.
Who are the luckiest readers EVER?
Have a happy weekend!

*smooches*

Gray Dreary, But Friday *w00t*

Good morning, kittens.
It would have been a lovely morning to stay in bed. Fortunately, I get to leave at 12:30 today, so I will be able to partake of many wonderful napping moments on my sofa. Huzzah.

The date last night was fun. I was a little late. I would have been on time, but Y postponed the date by about half an hour. I know, you'd think I'd be extra early. Instead, I dawdled. I was only a few minutes late anyway, but, for like the first time EVER, Y was on time. We had fun. Drinks. Food. Talk. Laughs. Got to watch a v. drunk man be cut off and then fall of his stool. (and no it wasn't either me or Y).

Unfortunately, Y's deadline took precedence over my need for nookie. *sigh* On the bright side, he got good results and accomplished a lot ... so the morning was kind of fun *wink*. He has a meeting with his advisors today, so he'll either be in a fantastic mood this afternoon or all forking depressed. Let's hope it goes well. VUBOQ needs a happy, nookie-filled weekend.

Speaking of weekends, did you know I live for them?

No big plans for today other than to catch up on my house-cleaning, movie-watching, and knitting.

Tomorrow, the house-cleaning will continue, accompanied by neighbor-helping and grocery shopping. In the evening, a bunch of the kittens are coming over for drinks, then dinner, then crazy clubbing at Town, the relatively newish dance club in DC. Fun times.

Sunday, I plan to spend some time recovering. Then, Y and I are driving to Baltimore to attend the graduation party of a friend of his. The dress for the party was "funky semi-formal" or something like that. I'm all like "um. what?" So, Y is supposed to call so we can figure out what in the heck we are supposed to wear.

Oh, and a few people (ok, one person) has asked about the Continuing Saga of The Birth of VUBOQ as Re-Enacted by Gay Bears (and a Virus or Two). Well, see, it's like this ... the weekend weather has been crummy lately, so I haven't wanted to take the Gay Bears out for any photography sessions. The next nice weekend day and I promise to put up the next installment ... Sorry for the delay, but you know how it is ...

Guess that's it. Have a wonderful Friday. *big smooches*

Walking on Sunshine

I can haz nu shooz. Yay!

I had a $10 reward certificate from DSW. I was looking for some dressy, slip-on brown shoes which I could wear to work. They did not have any that fell within my price range. SO, I bought these fun little plaid Tommy Hilfigers. Yay!

[Please ignore the totally disorganized desk.]

For some reason, I keep thinking it's Friday. Every time I remember it isn't, it makes me sad. Then, I look at my new shoes, and I'm happy. It's a rollercoaster of emotions, kittens.

*smooches*

A Day Which Will Live in Infamy

Yes. It's the One Year Anniversary* of my first date with Y. We are going to that very same bar tonight to relive the good times ... All the exciting details tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Last night was laundry. I have clean sheets. Yayz. My parents bought me these super soft Ridiculously High Count Egyptian Cotton sheets. I love them. I also hate them. They come out of the dryer uber-wrinkly. Shouldn't sheets fresh out of the dryer look clean und crisp? Not like they've already been slept on for 3 weeks? So, when I put the wrinkly (yet clean!) sheets on my bed, it looks icky. My bed only looks super nice about once every 3 weeks when I put clean sheets on. And, now, it doesn't even look nice then. *le sigh*

And, srsly, who is going to iron sheets? Not me. Fer sure.

Later that very same night, Across the Hall from DUN Neighbor came downstairs and I taught her how to fold origami cranes. DUN joined a few minutes later for a resume review session. It was totally hot. She hates the new format of my resume (but liked the content). I must now tinker (and write a cover letter), because one of the jobs I'm applying for closes today. Yikes!

Speaking of resumes, it would seem my joke about metrics fell a bit flat. Apparently, not everyone realizes that metrics is not only a wacky system of weirdo measurement, but also a term used to describe performance numerically. For example, you can say "Over the past five years, I increased productivity." Or you can say, "I instituted a new database management system which increased productivity by 75%."

And, I have heard that HR people get all moist when they read numbers.
And we call those numbers metrics.
Unfortunately, most of my metrics only make sense to people in the call center biz.
And, since I want to get out of the call center biz, I don't have a lot of metrics to use. Because, really, who, besides someone in the call center biz, wants to read that under my tenure the abandon rate has dropped from 5% to 4%? Bah.

Meanwhile, I'm off to the Post Office in a bit to mail my mom's Mother's Day present (yes, I know I'm bad). The package also contains Dad's Get Well Soon present and -extrememly- belated birthday present. Then, because I have a $10 off coupon, I'm going to DSW to treat myself to a pair of shoes.

I guess that's it for now. Must work on resume and cover letter.
More later. *smooches*

*First Year Anniversary Presents: Traditional - Paper/ Modern - Clocks. You know what to do.

StickSteven at the Movies

Who's ready to see these to Summer Blockbusters?




OK. Fine. I'm all braindead from working on my stupid resume. Cut me some slack.
*smooches*

The Never-Ending Board Meeting

OMG. It went on for hours.
And that was my evening, punctuated only by mealtime and booze.

Today, I actually have work to do. I could delegate it to the staff, depending on my mood. Right now, I'd rather plow through it myself. We'll see if that changes in a few hours.

I am also planning on revamping my resume today to make it more NGO-friendly. We'll see how that goes.

Quoth DUN, "It needs metrics."

Now I have to convert all my English measurements to metric. *sheesh*
Does anyone know what year 1992 is in the metric system?*

I also have to write my performance evaluation (eek. Due tomorrow at noon). I may simply copy the one from last year. I mean, really, I'm still fabulous.

Today's after work plan includes cleaning the bedroom, laundry, and (hopefully) resume reworking session with DUN (and martinis!).

Sorry this is so disjointed and rambling. More later. *smooches*

Grrr ...

I am hating Y's evil advisor. 5 minutes before I got home for my lunch break, he sent Y a not very nice email regarding Y's research/future in the program.

Can we say buzz kill?
Can we say someone walked all the way home for a little lunchtime nookie and all he got was a little lunch?
Can we say GRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.........?

So. Not. Happy.

On the way home, I had an idea for a fabulous new business:

Get it?

It would be a pottery studio/ bar. During the day and early evening, it would function as a pottery studio. At night, the lights go down and the Super Hip bartenders serve fantastic infused vodka cocktails into pottery glasses *you* made!

Fun, no?

At least something interesting came out of my lunch excursion ...
*le sigh*

Meat-Free Monday: Comfort Food Edition

Good morning, Kittens!

Unfortunately, there is no photo of my completed Meat-Free Monday meal. Here's a picture of the ingredients (and Chef's Little Helper) I borrowed from my 12 of 12 entry yesterday.

It was delicious. Many thanks to Mush for some last minute cooking advice via txtmsg.

Y came over around 8 for dinner and a movie ... and a martini. Mmm. I am loving the new martini: 3 parts Gordon's, 1 part vodka, and a half part of Lillet, shaken over ice and garnished with lemon peel. Yummy. Try it at home, whydoncha?

If all goes according to my evil plan, Y will still be home during my lunch break. I can sneak home for a little late morning nookie. Yay. Nookie.

I am using the nookie as motivation to at least update my resume for a non-profit job. Currently, I have a "government contractor" resume and a "federal employee" resume and a "chemical industry" resume. What I need is a "non-profit dogoodery" resume. It won't be that much different from all the others, actually ... just a slightly different focus, and, perhaps, highlighting my degree over my current experience. Or not ... I'm still deciding.

Then, after the nookie, I can come back to work energized to work on the cover letter. This plan falls apart if Y has to go to school. He wasn't sure if he needed to when we talked last night.

I guess that's it for now. More later. *smooches*

Updated to Note: WOO HOO! I've been STIMULATED!!!! HUZZAH!!!

May 12 of 12: Rainy Day Edition

I pass by this athletic field's parking lot every morning. The rocks always remind me of a Zen Garden:



This tree is in the yard of a doctor's office I pass by every morning. I love Japanese maples:



Please don't talk to me until I've had my morning coffee:



I should be applying for this job, rather than taking a picture of the announcement:



Yesterday, upon the stair, I saw a man who wasn't there:



The drainpipe near the liquor store:



Amy's Organic Broccoli Pot Pie for lunch:



Actually working. No, I don't care about your problems:



Back to Whole Foods after work, because I forgot to buy:



Sligo Creek after the rain:



I luv my pussy:



Chef's Little Helper, the Vesper Martini:



And, now I must go make my Meat-Free Monday meal, black bean chilli. YUM.

A few additional photos are in my May 12 of 12 flickr set.
*smooches*

If You Believe in Magic

Y and I will be going to Xanadu on the 31st. At 8PM. Assuming he can get the tickets.

Woo Hoo! Cheese-tastic!

Try not to be jealous. I'll take photos.

Weekend Update: Daniel Craig Edition

Good rainy Monday morning, kittens.

My weekend was v. exciting. It involved all sorts of drama and intrigue. For example, on Saturday, I had to decide if I should nap on the sofa or in my bed. AND, then, I had to decide what cocktail to make ... oh, the drama!

Friday evening, I went over to a neighbor's apartment for a graduation party. It was fun. I drank lots of beerz, and we played Apples to Apples ... which is a surprisingly fun game. Perhaps, the beerz contributed to this assessment.

Saturday, I woke up late (yay), made coffee (yay), and did some serious blobbing around the house. Later that afternoon, I weeded in the flower beds and transplanted my marigold seedlings. Then, I invited Tomokito down for experimental cocktails (and cheese!). For the cocktail, I shook lime juice and vodka over ice, poured into a chilled martini glass, and garnished with a few slices of frozen peaches. A version of the drink is pictured above. Quite delicious. If you're a big boozehead like we are...

I headed over to Y's around 5ish. He was still at school, so I blobbed on his sofa for a few hours. *aah* Sofa-blobbing is so nice no matter upon whose sofa you are blobbing. Once Y got home, I cooked dinner, which was also experimental. I brushed asparagus and zucchini with a balsalmic vinegrette and roasted them in the oven. Meanwhile, Y made tahini and I cooked rice. Once everything was done, I spread a layer of rice in a romaine lettuce leaf, place a couple stalks of asparagus and a slice of zucchini, and drizzled with tahini. Then, it was rolled up into a little taco/burrito like thing. Yummy.

After dinner, I made gin and tonics and we settled down to watch Casino Royale ... which I lurved, but Y found it stretched believability too far and went to study. Every now and then, he would come watch some of the movie, but proceeded to make comments about how unrealistic it was. Finally, I said, "Yeah, that means a lot coming from someone who organizes his weekly schedule around Desperate Housewives." And, he stopped criticising the movie. Yay me.

Sunday morning, we slept really late. I thought it was early, but when I asked Y what time it was, he said, "11:30." Then came the morning teh buttsecks, which was lovely, until this really odd thing happened ... right at a very crucial moment (for me), both my hands went numb (not entirely, but from the middle finger to the little finger). It was a bit distracting. The numbness wore off after a few minutes. It was weird. Has that ever happened to anyone else? I wonder if maybe we were compressing a nerve or something.

After a leisurely breakfast of blueberries, yogurt, and granola, I showered, packed, and headed home, where I blobbed on the sofa, drinking cocktails and watching Casino Royale (again). Isabella loved it.

At 9, a couple of us went over to another neighbor's to watch Desperate Housewives. It was OK. I'm not quite sure I get it, but whatever. I kept calling the characters by the names of characters they used to play in other shows ... There certainly are a lot of 90s TV Show alum on DHW.

And, that was my weekend. Huzzah! Today is the 12th, which means 12 of 12 photos to be posted later this evening. It's also, Meat-Free Monday. Why don't you join in the fun and enjoy a meat-free meal today? Help the environment and yourself!

Finally, here's a gratuitous photo of Isabella continuing to enjoy the glory that is Daniel Craig (he's nekkid, so she's averting her eyes. Such a prude!):











More later. *smooches*

Because ...

... I am tired of looking at a photo of scrambled eggs on toast, here is a new photo:



Can you name all four c-words pictured?

[and, no, J, one of them is not c--t.]

OK. Move along. Nothing else to see here.
*happy weekend smooches*

TGIF

Good afternoon, kittens!

And, what a loverly gray dreary afternoon it is!

Not having to come to work until 12:30 today was fantastique! I was able to stay up a little later than usual and sleep in a little later than usual. AND, get some extra cuddle time/morning nookie from Y. HUZZAH for morning nookie!

Plus, I had time to make a yummy breakfast. Mmm. Mmm.

Although, later, the post-secks endorphins had worn off, because Y was royally getting on my nerves. I can't decide if he's purposefully pushing my buttons or just being a complete dingus. All I asked him to do was when he leaves to lock the deadbolt and leave the other lock unlocked. He wanted to know why. And, "because that's what I want you to do" didn't seem to be enough. "It doesn't make any sense," he said. "It's better to lock both."

"I don't care," said I. "This is how I want it done."

Is it too much to ask someone to do things the way I want them done in my own home? Why does everything have to be questioned and analyzed? Maybe it's not the most logical thing, but it makes sense to me and I like it that way. I don't question all the things he does in his house. Gah-rrrr.

Anyway, my plans for the weekend are not overly exciting, unfortunately. Tonight, one of my neighbors is having a party to celebrate finishing law school. On Saturday, I'm having a Daniel Craig MovieFest: Casino Royale, Layer Cake, and, possibly, Lara Croft: Tomb Raider. And that's about it. Tres exciting, no?

BTW, have I mentioned how much I LURVE my pastel plaid acryllic plates lately? Because I do. I lurve them sooooooooo much.

*smooches*

Don't Panic

I won't be at work until 12:30 tomorrow, so no post 'til afternoon.
Keep your heads about you, kittens.
I still *heart* you.
It'll be OK.

*smooches*

Missed Connections

Sometimes, when I'm bored at work, I like to pretend the Missed Connections on Craigslist are written for me ...

Like this one:

can help you to paint or remodeling your house? - m4m - 30 (Arlington v)

wednesday night, 9.30 pm or so, saw you alone around your empty t house, can help you? ; ) would like to... maybe tomorrow night, would be nice, let me know... send me a message and describe situation or neighborhood...

Dear Creepy Man,

Please stop standing outside my house and peering in my window. I'm not alone. I have a pitbull. Next time I see you, I'm calling the police.

Love,
VUBOQ

PS. No. You can't help paint or remodel my house.

Brian "A" you are HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - m4m - 29 (Ashburn, VA)

You just moved to Ashburn not long ago! Everytime I see you around the community, you always look at me and smile! Want at least a dinner date? Let me know......

Dear Loser,

My name's not Brian. I look at you and smile because I am laughing at you.

Love,
VUBOQ

PS. I think you may have broken your exclamation point key. But at least you can spell ...

HOTT latin guy at Caribou - m4m (Logan)

long shot...were wore a sleeveless t shirt and spoke spanish (I believe) around 11 today. i was working by the front window. geez man, you are amazingly hot.

Dios mio!

Thanks for the compliment, but I don't date people who (a) can't spell and (b) have issues with capitalization and grammar.

Love,
VUBOQ

Hot Blond guy at Costal Flats - m4m - 26 (Fairfax)

You come into Costal Flats in FFX at least once a week and have dinner with your Mom. You were there yesterday wearing a purple shirt and dark pants and looking really good. If you really are looking at me (sometimes I can't tell) I am looking back. Get in touch. You-about 5"10, short blond hair, slim, sexy, and hot. And you have a fantastic smile! Me- Wanting to get into you.

Dear Mr. Wanting to Get Into Me (ew),

That was no Mom; that was my Wife.
*rimshot*

Love,
VUBOQ

PS. Have you ever tried talking to the guy? Sounds crazy, but it just might work.

Now, it's your turn. Have fun!

A Plethora of Interesting WaPo Articles

Today's WaPo is a veritable bounty of information ...

I found this quite intriquing: Islamic Divorce Ruled Not Valid in Maryland

The article discusses the Islamic divorce custom talaq, in which a man can divorce his wife by saying (writing?) "I divorce you" three times.

"Talaq lacks any significant 'due process' for the wife, its use, moreover, directly deprives the wife of the 'due process' she is entitled to when she initiates divorce litigation in this state. The lack and deprivation of due process is itself contrary to this state's public policy," the court wrote.

Reaction from a representative of the Muslim community:

"For the most part, Muslims expected this kind of ruling," said Muneer Fareed, secretary general of the Islamic Society of North America in Plainfield, Ind. "The contrary would be a surprise to them. They do not expect the U.S. legal system to give full recognition of talaq."

Um ... well ... duh. Srsly, people, finding a practice which is inherently discriminatory to be invalid is pretty much a no-brainer. I would imagine that if another world religion had a similar way in which a man could divorce his wife the Maryland court would also deem that to be unconstitutional.

Yet, in affirming the separation of church and state, I wonder if the court has inadvertantly created a situtation in which someone could be religiously divorced, yet legally married. [I really want to use the word ramifications but can't quite make it work ...]

I find it oddly compelling that the court willingly removes religion from divorce, yet continues to uphold religion's deathgrip on marriage. Now, discuss (a) Christianity's contribution to marriage rites in the US and (b) how the court should abolish the discriminatory practice of heterosexual-only religious marriage and recognize equal under the law civil unions for all.

And, speaking of gay sex ...

Duck-billed platypuses have ten (yes, 10!) sex chromosomes and "the key gene on the Y chromosome that confers maleness in most mammals is not on any of the platypus's sex chromosomes. It is on another chromosome, where it seems to have nothing to do with sex."

Read more about the wacky genome of the platypus here: Platypus Genome Found Fittingly Strange.

OK. Fine. You caught me. That has nothing to do with gay sex. It was a cheap tactic designed to keep you reading. Sorry.

Hard Candy Listening Party

Good Morning, Kittens!

How was your Wednesday? Chock full of fun and excitement? Mine certainly was ...

After finishing laundry (clean clothes! yayz!), Tomokito came down. We had drinks and listened to Madonna's new album, Hard Candy (which VUBOQ gives two thumbs up - WAY UP!). In fact, I'm listening to it. right. now. too.

The drink of the evening may sound a bit weird, but it was good. I made vodka tonics. The twist was that the ice cubes had frozen peach slices in them. So, as the ice melted the drink started to get a fruity-peachy flavor. Delicious! Srsly.

Tomokito and I talked about our plans to see Sex and the City: The Movie. I had promised her that we would go see it for her birthday; however, Y wants to go to New York City that weekend [May 30-June 1].

I had a brilliant idea! Tomokito could ride up with us to NYC, and we could see the movie there! At least it was brilliant until I told Y about it later. Y's response:

"You want to see a movie?! In New York?! Why would you want to do something in New York that you can do in DC?!" Blah blah blah yell yell yell

I was all, like, "What? I think it would be fun to see a movie filmed in New York in New York. If you don't want to, you can do something else."

Which lead to this big, unpleasant discussion ... apparently we have different ideas about holidays. I mean, it's just New York. It's not like we're flying 8 hours to go to London. Why not go see a movie?

Of course, I'm the guy who went bowling in Malaysia [which was totes fun, btw]. What difference does it make where you are, if you are doing something you like with people you like? Anyway, we worked it out. And, if Tomokito decides to come with us, we'll be seeing Sex and the City in NYC ... and then going out for cosmos, kittens!

The only other things I want to do whilst in the big city are

(a) Stalk Puntabulous,

(b) Visit MOMA,

(c) Hang with my friends, Jake and Alison, and

(d) Drool over these shoes in person:

Delicious.

More later. *smooches*

Facebook Question

Last night, sometime after the movie and before teh secks, I was surfing Facebook (Scramble! Scrabulous!), and -if you haven't noticed- Facebook sometimes suggests friends ... as in "You Might Know This Person. Friend Them Now, Kitten!"




We interrupt this post to say: OMG!!! Puntabulous AND Someone in a Tree friended me!!!! *squeeeeeeeee*




*ahem*

Anyway, Facebook "You might know this person"'ed me. I looked at the guy's picture and was all, "YUMMY. I hope I do."

A little research later, I discovered we went to High School together, but I didn't remember him. I dug out my high school yearbook (yes, I still have them) and looked up his picture. And, my picture, and

OMG. I was SO young! And, like, totes goofy. I was not the towering figure of VUBOQliness you see before you today, fer sure.

It turns out this "You might now this person" person was on the football and track teams. Tres sporty! Which is probably why I didn't know him.*

Which brings me to the ultimate reason for this post, the Facebook Question:

Do straight guys use shirtless pictures of themselves for their profiles on Facebook?

Because the guy's photo was screaming "GAYGAYGAY" (and also "YUM").

UPDATE: I've done a very bad thing and copied the photo. Here is is:

What do you think now? Or is it wrong to speculate on someone's sexuality based only on one photo and the knowledge that he used to run around in tight pants smacking other guys' asses?

*Please refer to The Breakfast Club if you don't understand why.

Nothing Happened Last Night

Y came over. We watched Edward Scissorhands again. I said that I thought the movie was a gay allegory. And, he was all, "but he likes that girl." And then I had to say, "you don't know what allegory means, do you?"

And, he was all, "No."
So I had to explain it. *bleah*

What do you think?

We drank almost an entire bottle of wine and went to bed. Well, I went to bed. Y stayed up reading or studying or something.

Before going to bed (and after watching the movie/explaining the Allegory of Edward Scissorhands), we discussed what we are going to do on May 15th - a day which will live in infamy, the anniversary of our first date.

We decided to go back to the Irish bar where we met. We're also thinking about taking a trip to NYC, either for Memorial Day Weekend or the next weekend. It really depends on if our friends' sofas are available those weekends or not.

In other news ... it's Laundry Day! Huzzah! I have to get quarters at some point today. Also, Tomokito burned a copy of Madonna's new album for me. Yay. Listening Party at my abode tonight or tomorrow (depending on when she brings me the CD). Hm. What else? I'm out of toothpaste and soy milk.

None of my co-workers have showed up for work yet. So, I'm leaving early. Bitches.

More later. *smooches*

They're Here!!

Secretworm T-shirts (from the Sean Show). I haz them.



Don't be jealous. You can haz them too!
[Just remember I haz'd them first!]

The More You Know ...

In the tradition of an even greater blogger than I, since it's Tuesday, I'm going to take this opportunity to teach you something.

Or not. Whatever.

First, a little quiz (because you know how we LURVE quizzes) ...

The photo is of:

(a) bell peppers
(2) cashews
(iii) Paris Hilton
(D) all of the above

The correct answer is ...

(2)

I first saw actual cashew fruit when I was travelling in Thailand in the late 90s. Having been an avid reader of National Geographic's World magazine during my formative years, I immediately pointed them out to my travelling companion, "Look, the ground is littered with cashews! Try not to step on them, because uncooked they can be a skin irritant!" We dutifully avoided smashing the cashews on the ground ... but I still managed to burn the soles of my feet later on the SuperWhiteHot sand at the beach. Gah.

Thailand was lovely though ...

*sigh*

I wish I were there now ... instead of at my desk eating leftover cashews from last night's cooking adventure.

And, speaking of my not-yet-arrived Stimulus Check, remember how I said I was going to put the whole thing into savings?

Well, I lied.

I signed up for the summer session of pottery before realizing I had no way to pay for it. Then, I remembered the Stimulus Check. Yay! So, I'll only be putting 2/3s of my Stimulus Check into savings with the rest paying for 10 weeks of pottery. Huzzah!

Finally, to end on a bright note, Tomokito called the White House Press Office and has confirmed that the Stimulus Check will be tax free. I had a sneaking suspicion that we would have to claim it next year. I am glad to have been proved wrong.